*Originally posted January 2020
We were blessed early in our marriage with two little individuals, who despite resembling each other physically and who happened to share my womb and were birthed the same day, are night and day different. I was terrified of becoming a mom, I was elated. I thanked God for his blessing, but questioned his decision to give us two at once. It was a roller coaster ride of emotional waves back then. Every so often, I get back on that ride these many years later.
When I first started on this writing journey, falling into the romance genre, the number of books with cute little twins or triplets on the front of romance novels surprised me. Sure, they make for cute book covers, but really? A sleep-deprived mom of multiples is NOT thinking of romance or noticing how helpful Cowboy Dan is, nor how nice it would be to make him a permanent part of the family – especially a mother of infant multiples.
Nope. Not going to lie to you.
Moms of multiples (and dads too) live in a fog for three months at least and then kick it into survival mode for at least a year. Parents of multiples learn how to work together, or are torn apart at the seams. Often feedings are tag teamed and diaper changes can be a joint effort. Don’t get me started on teething at the same time… I can’t tell you how many times I wanted to rip my hair out and bury my head under a pillow for at least a month, or how often I cried right along with my wailing babes.
And then, they turn two.
For all of you parents out there, you know how your sweet little two year old can go from 0-10 in 2 seconds flat. Now add another child the exact same age mimicking your child.
Is romance on your mind?
Real Life Romance with Real Life Twins
I understand the fascination of two little babies, or three, or four. I used to be fascinated by twins and wanted a set of my own. Now that I’m on the other side, my fascination definitely isn’t the romanticized kind.
I can buy romance for a single Mom or single Dad with three year old twins or older. By then, you’ve got a pretty good handle on the twin-thing and you actually have time to think about coordinating outfits and having five minutes to do your hair and make-up without a disaster happening outside the bathroom door. You’re finally getting some decent sleep and the last major obstacle is tackling potty training.
You feel like a new woman when the twins turn three.
Romance Books for Multiples Moms
I’d like to read more romance books that zone in on some of those realities of being a parent of multiples. I’ve read too many books that don’t get it right and sadly, I put the book down never to finish reading it. As cute as they are, those happy go lucky moments that pepper the books I’ve read are few and far between. I have found a select few romance novels that get it right – so there are some out there.
There is one of many easy fixes. Your life as a parent of multiples seems to be fair game for any comment – positive or down right critical. All you have to do is ask someone who has multiples, what people say to them when they are in public. I guarantee you, your mouth will drop.
I’ve decided to introduce the cutest set of four year old fraternal twin girls in my third novel (since twins are a popular trope these days). And yes, I will be flavouring the text with experiences from our own lives.
How about you? Are you fascinated by multiples in any books you read?